Life takedowns

‘You’re as useless as …’ 20 hall of fame put-downs that are very funny and totally nail it

Here are a bunch of very funny and totally on the money putdowns which we’ll definitely be sticking in our back pocket to use at an appropriate moment or two.

It all started when u/Ed_mutts_nuts asked this over on Reddit.

What’s a good ‘As useless as?’

And by way of a little background, they added this.

‘I love the English language and our creations. Someone came out with as useless as a woodpecker with rubber lips at a co-worker today. Cracked me up. Any more really original ones?’

And people responded with lots of really original ones, together with some classic golden oldies which will surely never go away. These 20 surely said it best.

1.

A cat flap on a submarine
Raptors40k

2.

A handbrake on a canoe
Wallygonk

3.

A fishnet condom.
Rich_b1982

4.

A button on a sock.
Wallygonk

5.

An ejector seat in a Helicopter!
Secretdurham

6.

As much use as the other half of the clock on Countdown.
4and20millionDoors

7.

A paper bag in a rainstorm.
Far-Fall-2913

8.

A reversing camera on a bobsleigh.
OldChorleian

9.

Inflatable dartboard.
Raptors40k

10.

An ashtray on a motorbike.
loki_dd