Greeks to sell Acropolis

Greek Crisis: The cash-strapped Greek government were accused of ‘selling off the family jewels’ today when it emerged that they have hung a huge ‘for sale’ sign on the Acropolis and put it on the market with a number of international estate agents.

While riot police battle protestors on the streets of Athens, Greek Prime Minister George Papandreou defended the move saying ‘don’t blame me, blame the IMF.’

“First they said austerity measures,” he told Radio 4’s Today programme, “then they said a lifetime supply of feta cheese and ouzo. Now they want us to sell off the Acropolis. What can I do? We’re not in charge any more.”

“It’d look great in our garden,” said David Beckham, who immediately declared an interest in buying the monument. Elton John is also rumoured to want it as a guest bathroom while Simon Cowell, famous for pioneering afro-greek interiors, said that it would be the ‘perfect place’ for thinking up a new ‘philosophy of pop’.

“The Acropolis would be a fantastic addition to any luxury home,” says head of Foxtons International, Jeremy Slyne. “Period features. Wonderful light. Bags of storage space.”

The Greek people, however, are less than pleased.

Speaking on Greek national radio this morning Petros Ballas, Professor of Classical History at the University of Athens, said “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!” Then he said, “Ah! Ah! Aaaaaaaaaaaargh!”