Activists vandalise 39.1% of Sky dishes

Scandal News: A group of activists opposed to media mogul Rupert Murdoch have begun vandalising exactly 39.1% of each of the nation’s 10 million Sky satellite dishes.

“We don’t have a problem with all of Sky, just the bit Murdoch owns,” said a spokesman for the group.

“Admittedly it would be a lot easier for us if he owned the whole thing – but I borrowed a hacksaw off my Dad and I’m quite good at maths so it hasn’t proved too hard.”

The group have defended themselves over criticisms that the protest trivialises the situation.

“This is a serious action over a serious issue. We have been boycotting Murdoch and his companies for many years, long before it became fashionable – personally I haven’t seen a 20th Century Fox film since Big Momma’s House 2 came out in 2006.”

Leading media commentator Tambor Fist summed up the nation’s feelings.

“Clearly this protest, the closure of the News Of The World and indeed the whole public outcry shows that British people no longer want a constant stream of salubrious scandal in their lives – unless that scandal is about the people who previously reported other scandals.”