NASA To Search For Life On Jeremy Kyle

Science News: Primitive biological life or cold, barren and dead? That’s the question NASA hopes to answer after announcing plans to explore Jeremy Kyle.

NASA has outlined ambitious plans to search for life on talk show host Kyle, who for years has been the subject of intense speculation over if he really is as dead as he appears.

“Many people think Kyle is a desolate, barren place that contains no life whatsoever,” said Dr. Doug Senviva from the Jet Propulsion Laboratory, California. “Our survey intends to answer that question once and for all. We don’t expect to find intelligence, but we’re very hopeful we can find some signs of life – albeit in a very primitive biological form.”

NASA have designed a special probe that will perform a wide range of tests on Kyle, with the the data beamed back to a special control room at a NASA facility in Washington. “If we do find life it has serious implications for humanity,” says Dr. Senviva.

“We would have to ask ourselves how something so seemingly dead can contain life – and exactly how many nukes do we have to use to destroy it?”

Story: Simon Swatman