This man live blogged his shopping trip to Ikea with his wife

This guy live blogged his shopping trip to Ikea with his wife and pretty much summed up the experience of anyone who has ever visited the yellow and blue Swedish flatpack furniture-themed fun park from hell.

They only went for a mirror. Did they get one? Or did they end up buying a load of stuff they don’t need and didn’t want? At least the meatballs were good, right?

1.

We are here. Our apartment is furnished. I am not sure why we are returning.

2.

We appear to be, in part, for lunch.

3.

I have dropped fruity purple sauce on my pants. As is tradition. It will likely stain. On Facebook, my aunt advises pouring boiling water over the spot. She further advises removing the pants before doing so.

4.

Receiving no instruction on where to place my food mobility unit, I have left it here. I hope it will not cause inconvenience.

5.

We are looking at candles. We have many candles. We bought our current candles at IKEA. These are slightly different.

6.

She has asked my thoughts on this storage solution. I said ‘We don’t have room for it.’ Apparently this is an incorrect response.

7.

We seem to be here for a mirror. I begin to recall a conversation where she expressed this need.

8.

This is not a mirror. Our ultimate purpose remains as mysterious as the little dots over the vowels in the item labels.

9.

My wife is charmed by the stuffed rats. This does not alarm or surprise me, although I am surprised that the rats feature so prominently in the display. It is a strange marketing choice.

10.

More rats. I begin to speculate they are somehow significant in Swedish culture.