66 times Prince Philip was the best troll ever, as he performs his final public engagement today
32. On the 1981. recession: “A few years ago, everybody was saying we must have more leisure, everyone’s working too much. Now everybody’s got more leisure time they’re complaining they’re unemployed. People don’t seem to make up their minds what they want.”
33. On the Duke of York’s house, 1986: “It looks like a tart’s bedroom.”
34. On the new £18million British Embassy in Berlin in 2000: “It’s a vast waste of space.”
35. On Tom Jones, 1969: “It’s difficult to see how it’s possible to become immensely valuable by singing what are the most hideous songs.”
36. Peering at a fuse box in a Scottish factory, he said: “It looks as though it was put in by an Indian.” He later backtracked: “I meant to say cowboys.”
37. To a British trekker in Papua New Guinea, 1998: “You managed not to get eaten then?”
38. To a car park attendant who didn’t recognise him in 1997, he snapped: “You bloody silly fool!”
39. To a civil servant, 1970: “You’re just a silly little Whitehall twit: you don’t trust me and I don’t trust you.”
40. To a fashion writer in 1993: “You’re not wearing mink knickers,are you?”
41. To a tourist in Budapest in 1993: “You can’t have been here long, you haven’t got a pot belly.”
42. To a woman solicitor, 1987: “I thought it was against the law for a woman to solicit.”
43. To Aboriginal leader William Brin, Queensland, 2002: “Do you still throw spears at each other?”
44. To a children’s band in Australia in 2002: “You were playing your instruments? Or do you have tape recorders under your seats?”
45. To Andrew Adams, 13, in 1998: “You could do with losing a little bit of weight.”
46. To Atul Patel at reception for influential Indians, 2009: “There’s a lot of your family in tonight.”
47. To black politician Lord Taylor of Warwick, 1999: “And what exotic part of the world do you come from?”
48. To Cayman Islanders: “Aren’t most of you descended from pirates?”
49. To deaf children by steel band, 2000: “Deaf? If you’re near there, no wonder you are deaf.”
50. To editor of downmarket tabloid: “Where are you from?” “The S*n, sir.” Philip: “Oh, no . . . one can’t tell from the outside.”
51. To Elton John on his gold Aston Martin in 2001: “Oh, it’s you that owns that ghastly car, is it?”
52. To expats in Abu Dhabi last year: “Are you running away from something?”
53. To female sea cadet last year: “Do you work in a strip club?”
54. To Lockerbie residents after plane bombing, 1993: “People say after a fire it’s water damage that’s the worst. We’re still drying out Windsor Castle.”
55. To multi-ethnic Britain’s Got Talent 2009. winners Diversity: “Are you all one family?”
56. To parents at a previously struggling Sheffield school, 2003: “Were you here in the bad old days? … That’s why you can’t read and write then!”
57. To President of Nigeria, who was in national dress, 2003: “You look like you’re ready for bed!”
58. To schoolboy who invited the Queen to Romford, Essex, 2003: “Ah, you’re the one who wrote the letter. So you can write then?”
59. To Scottish driving instructor, 1995: “How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to pass the test?”
60. To Simon Kelner, republican editor of The Independent, at Windsor Castle reception: “What are you doing here?” “I was invited, sir.” Philip: “Well, you didn’t have to come.”
61. To Susan Edwards and her guide dog in 2002: “They have eating dogs for the anorexic now.”
62. To the Aircraft Research Association in 2002: “If you travel as much as we do, you appreciate the improvements in aircraft design of less noise and more comfort – provided you don’t travel in something called economy class, which sounds ghastly.”
63. To the Scottish WI in 1961: “British women can’t cook.”
64. To then Paraguay dictator General Stroessner: “It’s a pleasure to be in a country that isn’t ruled by its people.”
65. Turning down food, 2000: “No, I’d probably end up spitting it out over everybody.”
66. Using Hitler’s title to address German chancellor Helmut Kohl in 1997, he called him: “Reichskanzler.”
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