19 of the best new coronavirus jokes to lower your blood pressure
11.
What’s the difference between Covid 19 and Romeo & Juliet?
One’s a corona virus and the other is a Verona crisis.
— Julian Lee (@JulianLeeComedy) March 14, 2020
12.
Ran out of toilet roll, so reduced to wiping my bum with lettuce leaves. I fear that's just the tip of the iceberg…
— Maz (@Emwold1) March 14, 2020
13.
can't stop thinking about the unspoken victims of social distancing: the horrible teens who've just discovered pashing and alcopops and now need to spend a month locked indoors with their parents
— Marie Le Conte (@youngvulgarian) March 15, 2020
14.
2053 years old. I hope He self-isolates. pic.twitter.com/OxqxUPcyq6
— David Baddiel (@Baddiel) March 16, 2020
15.
During self-isolation
Dogs:
OH MY GOD YOU’RE HERE ALL DAY AND THIS IS THE BEST AS I CAN LOVE YOU AND SEE YOU AND BE WITH YOU AND FOLLOW YOU AND I AM SO HAPPY AND EXCITED BECAUSE YOU ARE THE GREATEST AND I LOVE YOU BEING HERE SO MUCH!Cats:
What the fuck you still doing here?— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) March 16, 2020
16.
So how did you spend your first day in self-isolation? I saw a van parked across the road advertising quartz worktops and after several hours concluded that their tagline should be 'don't take quartz for granite'. Anyway see you back here tomorrow.
— Michael Spicer (@MrMichaelSpicer) March 16, 2020
17.
telling my 6 year old about homeschooling for the next couple months and he asked if i had to do that when i was a kid and i said no and then he asked if chairs were even invented yet, so i think the first thing we’ll study is his fucking attitude.
— my name is no. (@om_eye_goodness) March 16, 2020
18.
If you want to know how talkSport is coping they’re currently doing a phone-in on the top tips for playing Football Manager.
— Jim Waterson (@jimwaterson) March 17, 2020
19.
While I understand this is a troubling time for everyone, at least you’re not one cough away from 14 days locked inside with Boris Johnson…
— Larry the Cat (@Number10cat) March 17, 2020
Tune in tomorrow when we’ll learn that Boris Johnson tried to sue the coronavirus and Jacob Rees-Mogg bought shares in it.
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Simply 17 funny takes on the coronavirus to balance out the news