Our 25 favourite funny tweets from this week
13.
Out of desperation I just read my tea leaves, they said: “T he tEaB agiS bROk eN.”
— Ed (@iBrowsie) March 19, 2020
14.
My cleaner walked out the other day. I miss her. She’s left a vacuum.
— Andy Dutton (@Andy_Dutton) March 19, 2020
15.
oh don't thank me, just single handedly keeping the economy afloat by endlessly buying the wrong kinds of bulbs for my new lamps
— Marie Le Conte (@youngvulgarian) March 19, 2020
16.
@TwopTwips PRETEND you’re on the Great British Menu simply by eating porridge out of your trainers
— Michael (@MichaelKFenwick) March 19, 2020
17.
What happens when a giant building goes onto a rat?
It can hold it. It's a strong rat.
— Kids Write Jokes (@KidsWriteJokes) March 19, 2020
18.
So apparently you can’t say computer virus anymore, it’s PC gone mad.
— Jake Lambert (@LittleLostLad) March 14, 2020
19.
can't believe D:Ream lied
— Irn-Boo 🇪🇺 (@bookiesnacksize) March 19, 2020
20.
If I've learned one thing from television drama, it's this: always put your used pregnancy test DIRECTLY INTO THE OUTSIDE BIN
— Sanjeev Kohli (@govindajeggy) March 19, 2020
21.
Me: I think some people are just birds in disguise
Friend: Haha, can I tweet that?
Me: *narrows eyes* Can you what
— Adam Cerious (@Browtweaten) March 19, 2020
22.
"Now was this the man who stole your emojis"?
🧢
👂🏻👀👂🏻
👃🏻
🎈👅
💪🏼👕👍🏼
👖 🌂
👟👟 💼— Amanda (@Pandamoanimum) March 19, 2020
23.
Dear Thai green paste, stop looking like pesto, you camouflaged bastard.
— David Quantick (@quantick) March 19, 2020
24.
Is there anything worse than having a shower, getting all nice and clean for the day. Then immediately needing a poo after the shower. Sat there completely naked, towel at your feet having a soaking wet shit.
— Rob Beckett (@robbeckettcomic) March 15, 2020
25.
They only drink to forget. https://t.co/3lQRxQBCze
— Sam Whyte (@SamWhyte) March 18, 2020
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Our 25 favourite funny things from the past week
Image YouTube, Rufus Jones