People have been railing against the government’s plans for the trains – 13 first-class responses

The Secretary of State for Transport, Grant Shapps, has been doing the rounds of various media outlets to trumpet the government’s upcoming overhaul of the railway system.

Today I’m launching the Williams-Shapps #PlanForRail – the biggest change to our railways in three decades.

I’m setting out how we can make our railways work better for you, the passengers 🚆

Read it in full here: https://t.co/mvnOtkKQLX pic.twitter.com/R7IXD9ibif

— Rt Hon Grant Shapps MP (@grantshapps) May 20, 2021

The policy will see a flexible season ticket for frequent travellers, a more comprehensive choice of e-tickets, and – theoretically – a more joined-up service due to the schedule being run from a single point.

The new publicly owned body which will be responsible for all this has been named ‘Great British Railways’.

Great British Railways? HONESTLY. Am just off to drop a parcel at the Great British Post Office, before coming back for a cup of Great British Tea, and writing an article about a Great British Novelist at my Great British desk. It's like we're all living in an episode of Trumpton

— Fiona Sturges (@FionaSturges) May 20, 2021

Although not actual nationalisation, it was near enough for people to draw parallels between Great British Railways and Labour’s public ownership policy from the last manifesto.

Has the BBC denounced the Tories for 'railway communism' yet?

— David__Osland (@David__Osland) May 20, 2021

Remember when Corbyn suggested something like Great British Railways and everyone said he was a commie traitor?#CorbynWasRight https://t.co/CtJBSaMN0V

— Ricky Stevens (@RickyStevens) May 20, 2021

Although, there was this –

Don’t be fooled into thinking the Tories’ ‘Make British Trains Great Again’ idea is the carefully thought out plan from our Labour manifesto. Bringing railways back into public ownership requires real investment to create a reliable, safer, greener & more #accessible service. pic.twitter.com/j7iwhaXwL0

— Jeremy Corbyn (@jeremycorbyn) May 20, 2021

Between the name, the policy and the man in charge, tweeters had a lot to work with – and they really went to town.

1.

putting Grant Shapps in charge of fixing Britain's dilapidated rail network is like putting Grant Shapps in charge of fixing Britain's dilapidated rail network

— dave ❄️ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) May 20, 2021

2.

“Renationalise the railways but Grant Shapps is in charge of it” is real monkey’s paw stuff, isn’t it

— Dr Charlotte Lydia Riley (@lottelydia) May 20, 2021

3.

It could do with a few more flags. I can see a bit of roof at the back. pic.twitter.com/A7G2i6ul6t

— Stephen McGann💙 (@StephenMcGann) May 20, 2021

4.

Is the Great British Railway going to be a competition with a contestant voted out each week and the winner getting the contract for @SouthernRailUK ?

— Sarah 💙 Mattocks 🌾🌾 (@sarah_mattocks) May 20, 2021

5.

I'm going to make the trains run on time!
Then I'm going to move onto all the other great things that Mussolini did. pic.twitter.com/n4OroBEolq

— Parody Boris Johnson (@BorisJohnson_MP) May 20, 2021

6.

'Welcome to your Great British Railways service from Liverpool to Hull, it will take five hours, include two changes and cost you the best part of £70' pic.twitter.com/OscVYGPSsj

— Liam Thorp 💙 (@LiamThorpECHO) May 20, 2021