40 favourite funny tweets of the week(s)
21.
When I'm on a diet and pass the cookie aisle pic.twitter.com/bHAnvjfcoT
— Shauna.. na (@ForgetTheMoose) September 8, 2021
22.
Lawyer: What if every time you plucked a hair it sounded like wine being uncorked?
Opposing Counsel: Objection! Irrelevant
Judge: Overruled, I want to hear the answer
— Hi, it's Abby. Yep (@abbycohenwl) September 7, 2021
23.
me: I think some people are birds in disguise
friend: lol, can I tweet that?
me: *narrows eyes* can you what
— Adam Cerious (@Browtweaten) September 7, 2021
24.
stay together for the future spouses of your kids, having two sets of in-laws is sadistic stuff
— Village Person (@SvnSxty) September 6, 2021
25.
The Jurassic Park scene with the dinosaur struggling to break out of its egg but it’s me trying to get my head through the armhole of my sweater cuz I’m stupid
— Lord Hugh Mungus (@PoodleSnarf) September 7, 2021
26.
Looks like the mayor is getting serious. pic.twitter.com/72Hgoc2G1K
— Super 70s Sports (@Super70sSports) September 7, 2021
27.
Medusa: oh hello I'd like to make a hair appointment please
pet shop: please stop calling us
— Ella Zee 🌈👑 (@EllaZee5) September 6, 2021
28.
I don’t go anywhere without my emotional support killer wheel pic.twitter.com/e1e515hxDb
— (((Princess of Whales))) (@PrincesaBallena) September 7, 2021
29.
"I've spent 25 years designing wedding dresses in West London, one stop on from Warwick Avenue"
"Maida Vale?"
"I've done thousands mate"— Jack Bernhardt (@jackbern23) September 7, 2021
30.
oh you don’t want my dog to bark at you? then why would you stand calmly within a 2 mile radius of my house
— Ben Rosen (@ben_rosen) September 6, 2021
31.
Apple’s “strong passwords” be killin me. Whoooo is about to remember Ktfw76hTp09Mat4jeta
— Shay ✨ (@touuche_) September 7, 2021
32.
I just saw this and my first reaction was wondering why James Bond cut a small child in half pic.twitter.com/WBcs0zjHnm
— Calvin Dyson (@calvindyson) September 8, 2021
33.
what's the most attractive quality in a guy ? for me it's when they mod their vehicle to be extra loud
— Kate Flood (@KateFlood) September 9, 2021
34.
just handed in my notice after a customer ordered this guinness with milk and baileys pic.twitter.com/oaocTwyced
— butlins beauty queen (@hairiesthound) September 8, 2021
35.
sometimes the meaning of a tattoo is that you got it when u were 18
— damien (dima) (@dimakronfeld) September 9, 2021
36.
When I say yes to too many projects pic.twitter.com/waeFT06HkE
— Midge (@mxmclain) September 10, 2021
37.
My favorite childhood memory is my knees not hurting.
— Eden Dranger (@Eden_Eats) September 8, 2021
38.
Every day I wake up and think today’s the day I’m going to eat healthy and then I accidentally stumble into a cake shop and fall mouth first onto a chocolate brownie and it’s all ruined
— Lottie-pop 🍭 (@Lottie_Poppie) September 9, 2021
39.
when someone replies to a locked account it’s like watching Han talk to Chewie
— carz (@Carzonfye) September 9, 2021
40.
One does not simply walk into the larder. pic.twitter.com/cuD43efcnw
— . (@twlldun) September 10, 2021
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25 favourite funny tweets of the week
Image Screengrab, bady abbas on Unsplash