25 funny tweets of the week
13.
Apparently my aunt is doing some damage control after a crucial signage mistake pic.twitter.com/ULElOfXLCm
— (@ShelbyLano) April 5, 2022
14.
People often ask why I’m not more successful after 12 years of stand-up. I have to explain; “comedy isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon” and “unfortunately I’ve spent too much time on the side of the road, wrapped in an aluminium blanket, having passed out and pissed myself”.
— Ignacio Lopez (@comedylopez) April 7, 2022
15.
Adorable how my dryer sings a little song when it's done like I'm going to come skipping along like Ma Ingalls excited to fold shit
— cathryn (@AngryRaccoon2) April 4, 2022
16.
Ryanair is trying to make me pay for seats with the threat my family and I might have to sit separately. Well the joke’s on them, because I’d pay extra to not sit with them.
— Eoin O'Malley (@AnMailleach) April 7, 2022
17.
petitioner requests dissolution of the marriage based on pic.twitter.com/Imrs2H9bHZ
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) April 1, 2022
18.
My doctor says I'm a hypochondriac. Is that any way to speak to a woman who's probably dying?
— Emma Beasley (@JustBeingEmma) April 6, 2022
19.
It's a common mistake, but Frankenstein was actually the author pic.twitter.com/Z1CJNCf7EA
— Medlife Crisis (Rohin) (@MedCrisis) April 6, 2022
20.
i would enjoy john lennon's "imagine" a lot more if it started out with "imagine there's no people. it's easy if you try". then end it right there.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) April 7, 2022
21.
Yesterday's old-newspaper-hoarders are today's 200-open-tabs-on-Safari e-hoarders.
— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) April 5, 2022
22.
My dog just informed me we’re acquaintances at best.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) April 6, 2022
23.
I asked my husband to hand me my birth control while he was up and he brought me one of our kids instead. Well played
— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) April 6, 2022
24.
POPE: Let us all bow our heads and pray.
MICHELANGELO, from the back: Or maybe look at the ceiling.
— Scott Sevena (@scot7a) April 5, 2022
25.
i actually feel so bad for caesar. imagine your best friend kills you and all you get is a salad named after you
— trash jones (@jzux) April 6, 2022
READ MORE
Our 25 favourite funny tweets of the week
Image Explorer Bob and NakNakNak on Pixabay