‘What is the stupidest thing you’ve done?’ – 23 fabulously dumb confessions

Even the smartest among us – no, we’re not looking at you – occasionally do very stupid things. And not only are they stupid, they can also be very funny.

Why are we wanging on like this? Because over on Reddit we’ve been reading all the answers to the person who asked this.

“Stupid people of Reddit, what is the stupidest thing you’ve done?”

And these were surely 23 of the stupidest – and funniest – responses.

1.

‘I put an umbrella handle in my mouth and pushed the button to release the umbrella.

‘I thought the umbrella would shoot out the front of my mouth and open. Instead the handle extended back into my mouth and broke my front teeth. No idea why I thought that.’
pentarou

2.

‘Barber while cutting my hair asks ”what do you do for a living?”. I replied “I’m an accountant. You?”
[deleted]

‘And I’m dumb because I couldn’t initially figure out why this was a dumb response.’
scnavi

3.

‘Late for work, running around the house looking for my keys. Ran upstairs, saw them on the desk, pointed at them and said to the air, “There they are.” I was nearly to the front door before I realized I didn’t actually pick them up.’
joshuastronomy

4.

‘I once started talking shit about a friend who I’d forgotten we had just picked up and was sitting in the backseat of the car. This one still keeps me up at night.’
Mutt1223

5.

‘At a job I worked long ago, the crew boss had forgotten he had agreed to give Dave a ride home that night.

‘We cut lawns at various places, and Dave wasn’t so good at it. We drove past one of those places on the way home, and he started ranting “Fucking Dave, he missed half that lawn, and it looks like shit. That guy is as dumb as a rock”.

‘Dave quietly spoke up from the back seat “I’m trying my best”. It was pretty quiet for the rest of the ride home.’
Hloden

6.

‘I was riding my bike and wondered what would happen if I stuck my feet in the spokes of my front tire.

‘Answer: Flipped over the handle bars, broke my two front teeth and road rash on half my face.’
jingle_hore

7.

‘Called my girlfriend a “big girl” for finishing her dinner.’
Jenkins92

8.

‘One time I went through the drive thru at Dunkin donuts and stopped at the trash can instead of the speaker for about 5-8 minutes repeatedly saying “hello?”
Johngdetti

9.

‘Friend came to my house. Knocked on my door. When I answered it I was greeted with “Hey are you home?”
[deleted]

10.

‘When I was younger I got kicked out of ballet class because I kept running into the mirrors thinking they were open windows or like portals to another world or something.’
JuniperLeaf

11.

“In junior high, I swallowed a pencil in class.”

“The emergency room doctor looked me up and down and said ‘I expected to see a three-year-old’.”
[deleted]

12.

‘I drilled into the side of my thigh with a 10mm drill bit while drilling holes through the bottom of one of my girlfriend’s flower pots.’
Sy27