![](https://cdn.thepoke.com/uploads/2022/12/06012840/pantries.jpg)
Penny Mordaunt’s ‘food pantries’ announcement is a cringeworthy spinfest of epic proportions
It’s 2022. The UK is one of the most developed countries of the world. Why, then, is a Tory MP opening three ‘food pantries’, so that people in her constituency can afford food – and enjoy some warmth for a while?
Penny Mordaunt, shared this video about the not-quite-food-banks, and if you’re allergic to spin – look away now.
I’m opening 3 new Food Pantries in Portsmouth North with the proceeds from @GreaterTheBook. Paulsgrove and Baffins now up and running.
Huge thank you to @TheHive_Project @portsmouthtoday @CircularIT @portsmouthnews @StCuthbertCofE @PaulsgroveC @coopuk @PegasusPrince2 @LewisGos92 pic.twitter.com/ImJmLUanIy— Penny Mordaunt (@PennyMordaunt) December 7, 2022
Subtle plug for the new book, there.
Nobody’s saying that cheaper food isn’t both welcome and necessary; a lot of people fall into the gap between food banks and no help at all.
It might be wise, however, to tone down the air of benevolence when announcing an unfortunate intervention your own voting record has helped to make necessary.
These reactions have it covered.
1.
Do you not feel a bit like a pilot bragging about providing what is clearly not enough parachutes while steering the plane at the ground https://t.co/2UY9MdwSia
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) December 8, 2022
2.
the worst thing about Christmas is Tory MPs doing photo shoots at food banks *hi Penny Mordaunt*
— dave ❄️ 🥕 🧻 (@davemacladd) December 8, 2022
3.
Food 'pantries' now.
They rebranded 'soup kitchens' as 'food banks', but the veneer has inevitably worn off that too.
Coming soon: Food cornucopias, comestible mansions, provisions palaces, grocery Edens, subsistence shangri-las…
⬇️This is an admission of governmental failure. https://t.co/Pu2eRtqqR6— Richard Littler (@richard_littler) December 8, 2022
4.
I wonder who thought of rebranding food banks as food ‘pantries’? https://t.co/5oGNjS7mhD
— David Aaronovitch (@DAaronovitch) December 8, 2022
5.
Imagine boasting about opening food banks instead of slithering away in shame and disgrace https://t.co/xv1CpyOUMb
— Priyamvada Gopal (@PriyamvadaGopal) December 8, 2022
6.
Imagine being able to legislate so that no one in Britain suffers in poverty – but instead shamelessly bragging about offering food banks for people you’ve catastrophically failed whilst plugging your book. pic.twitter.com/ZXJudMubaR
— Supertanskiii (@supertanskiii) December 8, 2022
7.
— Captain Howdy (@MajorPazuzu) December 8, 2022
8.
She's so proud of this. Food "pantries". Just one of the starkest, bleakest manifestations of the atrocious Tory rule of the last 12 years. Yeah, congrats Penny. https://t.co/23B6JPPOjS
— Declan Cashin (@Tweet_Dec) December 8, 2022
9.
These places wouldn’t be necessary if it wasn’t for your supremely shitty party. Do better.
— Fancy Brenda 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️ (they/them) (@SpillerOfTea) December 8, 2022
10.
'Food Pantries'.
Workhouse = Freedom Cottage
Starvation = Skinny Dipping
Freezing to Death = Refreshing Break
Benefits Cut = Opportunity Door https://t.co/8gPJtGpsK2— andy peacock (@AndyPeacock999) December 7, 2022
11.
One of the more sinister manifestations of how our politics has become debased is this, Tory MPs doing photo ops at food banks (or 'pantries), as if food banks were perfectly natural phenomena and not the brutal end point of the Tory war on the poor. https://t.co/TFxyLI6Us9
— simon maginn (@simonmaginn) December 7, 2022
12.
Don’t worry Penny Mordaunt has opened 3 Food Pantries for you.
It’s like a Food Bank but with extra condescension and sleaze.
— BladeoftheSun (@BladeoftheS) December 8, 2022
13.
The more I think about this the angrier I get. Her party's policies caused this poverty, & she wants gratitude for throwing a few pennies at foodbanks. She's also happy to use them to plug her book. Shame on you Mordaunt. @PennyMordaunt https://t.co/PSeAkYr9mf
— Oli Stirling (@OWS1892) December 7, 2022
14.
When they bring back child chimney sweeps they'll call it vertical job opportunities https://t.co/k2Q8AlBDby
— joe heenan (@joeheenan) December 8, 2022
We probably can’t completely rule out one or more of these popping up.
I'm not sure about 'Food Pantries'. Let's brainstorm this. What about:
-Grub Hubs
-Nom Nom Stations
-Snack Shacks
-Nosh Ports
-Hungry Hungry Depots
-Scoffeterias
-Penny's Tone Deaf Austerity-Tuck Shops
-'£4bn of Unusable PPE' Sustenance Cafes
-Nadhim Zahawi's Cosy Horse Stables— Michael Spicer (@MrMichaelSpicer) December 8, 2022
READ MORE
David Cameron’s been volunteering at a food bank and the internet spoke as one
Source Penny Mordaunt Image Screengrab