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This 19th-century advice on ‘How, When and Who to Marry’ is a guide to staying single

An image of the contents page from an 1890 advice book on marriage has been getting a lot of attention after being shared on Reddit by u/EbonyStealth.

If you’ve already mittened a mechanic, you might want to stop reading now.

The ’16 page descriptive circular’ was a free booklet back in the 1890s for anyone prepared to write and request one from the publisher, J.S. Ogilvie of New York, acting on behalf of the author, named only as Hildreth.

You can read the whole thing here, if you’re contemplating marriage and need some really bad , random and frankly very shallow and bigoted advice on the topic.

The booklet contains such misogynistic advice as –

Don’t marry a coquette. One that is worn out by a long list of discarded admirers is like stale bread—worse every day and seldom grows better by long standing.

Don’t marry a woman for her money. These people are tenacious to a minute degree. They long to remind you of my house, my property, my farm, my lots on Lincoln Avenue, my furniture, my bank account, and the like.

If there is any difference, it should be with the man. He is expected to control property. He is the master of his house.

And then there’s this –

Don’t marry a foreigner,—one who comes from a far-away country and returns to it. It is very uncertain; think ahead carefully. The new and strange customs of his country may and may not be congenial.

via Gfycat

Redditors didn’t even need to see all that to have some pretty strong thoughts about the advice.

Don’t spurn a man for his poverty but also don’t marry a man too poor. wtf?
Fantastic_Citron_344

“Don’t dally about proposing.” “Don’t marry too hastily.”

It’s like a set of demands for unattainable perfection.
mt-Room

Thank God they warned me about not marrying a clown..whew!
Mimi_Roof_4432

Books like these are so weird to read. It’s exactly 50% common sense good advice, and exactly 50% old-timey sexism.
Toxinogen

Too bad I am both a clown and a silly girl 😔 I’ll never find love.
Gallifreyaan

Don’t marry anyone who hyphenates like th-
at.

thebadpixel

Not too fast not too slow, not too tall not too short. Not too rich not too poor. Sounds like Goldilocks is getting married…
MrZwink

Aw crap, I was planning to marry for spite next time.
ArsenalSpider

I’ll mitten a mechanic when I damn well feel like it.
Sensitive_project583

u/jacknshit summed it up.

In short, Don’t Marry.

Because we don’t want any of you left wondering, ‘to mitten’ is 19th-century slang for ‘to reject’ – so yay for the mechanics.

READ MORE

15 genuine 19th-century problem page quotes from the Girls’ Own Advice Twitter account

Source r/funny Image r/funny