Tory MP Damian Green fondly recalled swimming in raw sewage and everybody took the p*ss
Water companies have apologised for the amount of raw sewage that’s been dumped into the UK’s waterways and have pledged to take greater steps to clean up their act.
I hear the water industry has a big announcement tomorrow.
Will it be a truly radical and compelling solution to the sewage scandal or the same old rearranging of the deckchairs?
My money’s on the latter. pic.twitter.com/gNCHh2MAF5
— Feargal Sharkey (@Feargal_Sharkey) May 17, 2023
There’s one glaring problem …they plan to make customers foot the bill.
After dumping sewage in seas, chemically polluting rivers, failing to upgrade Victorian pipes & handing huge dividends to shareholders, all water firms have to offer is “sorry – oh by the way we’re putting your bills up”. What a shitshow. @Feargal_Sharkeyhttps://t.co/6YF97v6gI5
— Caroline Lucas (@CarolineLucas) May 18, 2023
Disgraced former de facto Deputy Prime Minister Damian Green wasn’t sure what the fuss was about.
"I remember as a child in South Wales swimming in sewage"
Conservative MP @DamianGreen says water pollution from sewage dumping has always been an issue, but it used to be perceived as more acceptable #Peston pic.twitter.com/386v3pltuJ
— Peston (@itvpeston) May 17, 2023
Whatever floats your boat, Damian – and it’s apparently copious amounts of human waste.
These responses have it covered.
1.
Not for the first time, it's the satirists I feel sorry for. https://t.co/0EeskH9GmS
— James O'Brien (@mrjamesob) May 18, 2023
2.
Tories 2024: we actually enjoy swimming in human shit https://t.co/fv39LE0m7Z
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) May 18, 2023
3.
The good old days when we swam in proper British sewage. None of yer foreign muck. #itvpeston pic.twitter.com/dIAwOyje30
— Otto English (@Otto_English) May 18, 2023
4.
As a Tory MP, he clearly enjoyed it so much he pursued it as a career. https://t.co/3De47dtovd
— THE SECRET TORY – OBE 🇬🇧 (@secrettory12) May 18, 2023
5.
Not long before the "so actually, water that's too clean isn't very good for you" rhetoric to start appearing https://t.co/tmngqxKgCW
— Craig Deeley 🇪🇺🏳️🌈 🇺🇦 (@craiguito) May 18, 2023
6.
He says it didn't do him any harm, but Damian Green is only 24 years old. https://t.co/3De47dtovd
— THE SECRET TORY – OBE 🇬🇧 (@secrettory12) May 18, 2023
7.
Something happened in the intervening years that meant nobody was swimming in sewage though didn't it. Some political body Britain joined that regulated sewage in the water. What was that again? https://t.co/IvkadME2q5
— Florence of Northumbria (@FlorenceHRScott) May 18, 2023
8.
This dog’s just phoned LBC to say he’s not being funny but in his day when swimming in raw sewage led to gastric convulsions and liver failure they had a mini-milk and bloody well got on with it 😎 pic.twitter.com/1Dib4kx63i
— Sarah Dempster (@Dempster2000) May 18, 2023
9.
“I used to lie awake at night dreaming of swimming in sewage, just for a few hours” https://t.co/5XVzrvAOUc pic.twitter.com/89ZhNaBIpx
— Rob B (@RobBfromDerby) May 18, 2023