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This family’s unconventional efforts to get rid of a rat is today’s funniest thing
Here’s a lovely thread to get your week off to the right start.
It’s the tale of this family’s particularly unconventional efforts to get rid of a rat from their house and it’s a fabulously funny read.
It was posted by @ultramaricon over on Twitter and it’s a delight from start to finish, even more if you’ve ever had trouble ejecting a critter from your home (so everyone, then).
1.
for weeks my parents have been at war against a very resourceful rat and I’ve been begging them to call pest control but no my dad would rather balance a banana on a 2×4 over a garbage can full of water like a fucking cartoon cat pic.twitter.com/n5iB4DGwLd
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
2.
my favorite thing about this tweet so far is that Evan Ross Katz quote tweeted a picture of my parents’ kitchen for about 32 minutes
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
3.
some notes:
1. my dad used banana bc the rat kept eating all the bananas
2. I, too, love rats and hate to see them harmed
3. this rat is now dead
4. ziwe addressed me on this, the 17th day of June in the year 2023, re: a rat at my parents’ house
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
4.
5. rat had been tormenting them about a month
6. they have a cat, the cat was not interested in getting involved
7. my dad is a catch-and-release guy, alleges he tried all the traps at all the stores before mom took over
8. I will not describe the finale on the Internet
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
5.
9. it did not work tho it very well could have
10. what happened is the garbage can leaked and my father walked into the kitchen in those slides that all immigrant dads wear that have zero traction and slipped and hurt his elbow so my mother sent everyone home including the rat
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
6.
11. i’m DYING @ incels defending my dad’s masculinity
12. I’m not clicking any links but thank you
13. my dad is old, retired, has a sense of humor and all the time in the world
14. their house is not filthy, some of you are acting like you were raised in a glass box gtfo
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
7.
15. yes peanut butter I get it
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
8.
the slides in question pic.twitter.com/rUiaiZsNCh
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023
9.
ok um, notes on the general disposition of the rat:
1. it was living on the floor in the pantry when it was discovered
2. it ate everything: houseplants, vegetables, things in bags and bins, shoes, and of course bananas
3. my parents locked away all food. all. so it ate a shoe
— Vanta Greige (homosexual) (@ultramaricon) June 17, 2023