Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
Welcome to our weekly round-up of things that made us laugh on Twitter. There’s plenty in it, so you should be able to find a few things to suit your taste.
Give your favourites a follow and a retweet.
Occasionally NSFW.
1.
Mutant healing powers and Adamantium Bones don't count for shit when there's a piece of Lego on the floor. pic.twitter.com/4Hgkk9FUO6
— HappyToast★ (@IamHappyToast) July 11, 2023
2.
I wish the kerchief industry would go beyond handkerchiefs and neckerchiefs. I want a backerchief, a chestkerchief, a pair of footkerchiefs. I want so many kerchiefs that people call me Chief Kerchief.
— Martin Pilgrim (@MartinPilgrim1) July 10, 2023
3.
Never been into Fleetwood Mac but just heard a song where they start playing a cover of the theme from Formula One at the end love it lads – let's have Grandstand next please 👍
— Ruth Husko: Too cheeky (@dank_ackroyd) July 9, 2023
4.
Our (lovely) neighbours have milk delivered. Thing is it’s at 3am and really loud. I lie awake for an hour and a half stewing about exactly why anyone would need milk delivered in N London. The shops and groceries are boundless. 24 hour!! Wake up gagging for a coffee. No milk.
— Jim Howick (@JimHowick) July 12, 2023
5.
A Quiet Place II is on, the one with Cillian Murphy & could have been called Speaky Blinders
— Toby Earle 🇺🇦 (@TobyonTV) July 9, 2023
6.
me at 16: i am going to be so successful when i grow up
me now: maybe someday i will have enough energy to start a hobby
— trash jones (@jzux) July 12, 2023
7.
Dave Gahan looks like he’s the new wild man of snooker having a bit of a show-off at the Crucible between frames. pic.twitter.com/agoeNDsKWt
— Mark Sweep (@riffraffhands) July 12, 2023
8.
The problem with AI translating dead languages is that it could literally say whatever the fuck it wanted & other than a few hermitic scholars, we would be like “oh! Wow! I had no idea Abba was popular back then!” pic.twitter.com/d9tlJWTmXj
— Duncan Jones (@ManMadeMoon) July 10, 2023
9.
New euphemism just dropped. pic.twitter.com/wF74vo5dbx
— Rainy (@rainy101) July 11, 2023
10.
Mood: The Mission Impossible guy not catching the whole message before it self-destructs and having to call his supervisor to send it again.
— Fomo Simpson (@HaliPhacks) July 13, 2023
11.
me in 1997: i can't wait for the future when microsoft word fixes all the issues and it becomes a more user-friendly piece of software
me in 2023: any day now probably
— Michael Spicer (@MrMichaelSpicer) July 11, 2023
12.
That is a true statement. pic.twitter.com/rui5Am2n24
— jamie (@gnuman1979) July 13, 2023