Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
Welcome to our round-up of the stuff that made us laugh this week. There are puns, topical gags, funny pics – in fact something for everyone who isn’t a complete killjoy.
Give your favourites a retweet, or whatever they’re calling it these days.
1.
The guy on the Madri bottle. You meet him at a wedding and you think he looks like a knob but then he's actually really nice and keeps saying "that's amazing buddy" when you tell him about your life which actually makes you dislike him. pic.twitter.com/gPzS075vR0
— Benjamin Partridge (@benpartridge) August 6, 2023
2.
I won't lie: there were times today when I didn't think I'd make it back from the fridge. But sheer guts and determination saw me through. pic.twitter.com/A2a56ajhEt
— Geraint (@geraintgriffith) August 6, 2023
3.
Pretty wild how quickly Tesco Clubcard went from meaning you could get 3x the value of your earned vouchers to spend on restaurants and days out, to meaning you can now buy butter for the same price you used to be able to buy it for three months ago.
— Mark Grimshaw (@MarkGComedyUK) August 6, 2023
4.
Me, seeing someone wearing Nirvana shirt: Name three of the noble eightfold path!
— Jason, ex Inferis (@benedictsred) August 7, 2023
5.
You skip over the intro to Succession. I play my invisible piano through the opening credits of every single episode. We are not the same.
— Felicia (@LostFelicia) August 7, 2023
6.
6:30am *pours coffee*
This is definitely the week I get my shit together.
6:31am *spills coffee*
— Uncle Bob 🍩 (@UncleBob56) August 7, 2023
7.
wife's still mad that I responded to the priest after he said our wedding vows with "agree to disagree"
— 🌜🤷♂️Dad Moon Rising 🤷♂️🌛 (@raoulvilla) August 7, 2023
8.
Fuck pride month Target is indoctrinating kids into the 83 y/o Irish man lifestyle pic.twitter.com/odlVXEhE80
— pool boy at the vampire mansion (@feebleflesh) August 3, 2023
9.
I went to the gym, had a good session then headed home. Couldn’t get my key in the door. The neighbor came out and said “you moved house last week.”
I’m taking this as an indication that I’m engrossed in my current book rather than that I’m going nuts…
— Irvine Welsh (@IrvineWelsh) August 7, 2023
10.
Son took pair of my pants off clean washing pile by mistake instead of his own. Met him to do pant exchange. He said, what a costly mistake. I said, pants don’t cost much. He said, I mean the yrs of therapy I’ll need to get over swapping pants with my Mum in a Devon pub car park.
— Cally Beaton Namaste Motherf**kers podcast 🙏 (@callybeaton) August 8, 2023
11.
"You boy, we're in the wrong meme by mistake…" pic.twitter.com/3TXuXlZtRV
— christhebarker (@christhebarker) August 8, 2023
12.
Forget A.I, the future of porn is claymation
— Missy Martinez (@MissyXMartinez) August 10, 2023