People have been sharing tales of the fastest they saw someone fired – 17 record-breakers

Not every job we’ve had has always worked out in quite the way we would have liked, and that is (probably) true of everyone.

But we’ve never had a job go wrong quite so quickly as any of these tales of ill-fated (and short lived) employment.

It all stated when someone called Quintowne had this question for their fellow Redditors.

“What is the fastest way you’ve seen someone get fired?”

And the answers came in thick and fast. We’ve read them all – well, quite a few of them – so you don’t have to, and these 17 made our jaw drop furthest.

1.

‘First day on the job, gave another coworker a wet-willy. Shit you not.’
themoistdonut

2.

‘First day at work, hired by a temp agency. Me and one other guy, we put stuff in boxes and tape them shut, stack boxes on a pallet.

‘He can’t keep up, can barely use a tape gun and decides its time for break. Goes to the lunch room and takes a lunch. It was the bosses lunch, he stole the guys meal his wife prepared for him.

‘Boss man came over 15 mins later and wants to know who ate his BBQ, sticky fingers and BBQ on his shirt he denies it. I just look at him and the Boss and said well I hope it was good man.’
BigNotGay420

3.

‘Had a supervisor start selling Amway from his office, hinted at favorable treatment for anyone who would buy.

‘Reported him to HR–and when they asked if it was true, he pulled out a catalog and tried to sell them something. Fired on the spot.’
walkingknight

4.

‘A colleague let a middle school kid drive the bus. Buh-bye!’
Useful_Exchange3583

5.

‘I did the firing. I was sous chef of a large reception hall, meaning serving food to hundreds and hundreds of guests.

‘One party had a big seafood display. Shrimp, oysters, crab legs & vodka, all in a giant decorative box of ice.

‘When that portion of dinner service was finished, two new waiters were tasked with returning the big ice box + leftovers to the kitchen and dish pit.

‘They dumped the ice back into the ice machine. The contaminated ice. It even had some discarded shells.

‘I saw it happen. I had to show them the door immediately and have a serious talk with their head waiter. They lasted 2 hours, tops.

‘Those idiots could’ve killed someone. Imagine you have a severe shellfish allergy and the ice in your glass of water is lethal.’
GhettoSauce

6.

‘I saw a coworker once make a “big boobs” gesture as our boss’ wife walked past….with our boss walking right behind her.

‘He was packing his shit within 5 minutes.’
BrokkenArrow

7.

‘The guy responsible for opening the shop on Saturday morning went out and got blitzed on Friday night.

‘We showed up to work to find his car in the lot but the doors locked. He didn’t answer his phone. Had to call the owner in to get us inside. Guy was fast asleep, under his desk.

‘He was gone before you could say hangover.’
davisherm

8.

‘Had a coworker explain to our supervisor how he found this great loophole for making extra money: if a customer had exact change, he’d just pocket the cash and cancel the order on the register.’
DudebroggieHouser

9.

‘Worked in a restaurant and when the table wanted to return their Mai Tai the server chugged it right in front of them and said “it tastes fine.”
ThatsRubbishMate