![](https://cdn.thepoke.com/uploads/2023/11/05230631/millionaire.jpg)
We regret to inform you that the mid-life-crisis millionaire now claims to have reverse-aged his penis
It’s been weeks since we last had an update from 46-year-old multi-millionaire Bryan Johnson, whose main aim in life is to melt away the years and be 18 again, through various often mind-boggling means, such as having blood transfusions from his teenage son.
Little did we know that the silence was an enormous blessing in disguise. Okay, we knew – but we didn’t know how much of a blessing it was until we found out what he’s been up to.
Millionaire biohacker Bryan Johnson, 46, claims he has reverse-aged his PENIS by 15 years https://t.co/Uk8BvpXb0h pic.twitter.com/RNlh1rOHSM
— Daily Mail Online (@MailOnline) November 10, 2023
Millionaire biohacker Bryan Johnson, 46, claims he has reverse-aged his PENIS by 15 years https://t.co/Uk8BvpXb0h pic.twitter.com/RNlh1rOHSM
— Daily Mail Online (@MailOnline) November 10, 2023
You can probably imagine how people feel about it – but you don’t need to.
1.
absolutely cannot tell you how fast the skin crawled off my body at the thought of 46 year old man whispering to me about how he's reversed aged his penis. pic.twitter.com/UsXkmPLmIE
— Dr Fern Riddell (@FernRiddell) November 9, 2023
2.
i have never seen a photo of this man looking like anything other than a 46 year old man wearing matte foundation https://t.co/Y5EFVzjxfj
— matt (@mattxiv) November 11, 2023
3.
just imagining the country doctor who travels from town to town assesing the local dicks by age, and when he gets to this man his glasses fall off in disbelief. https://t.co/d3Czq4bpFT
— Niko Stratis (@nikostratis) November 10, 2023
4.
I reverse-aged my PENIS too far and now, though I can still have sex, it is immoral to. https://t.co/rSMJL81FAa
— Sridhar Ramesh (@RadishHarmers) November 10, 2023
5.
His doctors are just telling him any old shit aren’t they pic.twitter.com/UK9lhfpzKS
— Gwdihŵ (@youwouldknow) November 12, 2023
6.
The face of a man who has to listen to a millionaire justify liking CBT as “rejuvenating” his penis instead of just owning his kink. pic.twitter.com/U4ohhsuFo5
— Mistress K (AKA HeadstrongHotwife)️️⚧️ (@HeadstrongHW) November 10, 2023
7.
Roses are red,
Kittens have ears https://t.co/7GBkHjgoY0— Ꮍᴀᴇʟ (@elle91) November 10, 2023
8.
I don’t think anyone has ever said “you have the penis of a 31 year old” as a compliment https://t.co/zDnXvL1j8J
— Chase Mitchell (@ChaseMit) November 10, 2023
9.
Trump, TikTok, the pandemic…
so much he needs to talk to his wiener about https://t.co/NtrTgkEJ8P— Brittlestar (@brittlestar) November 11, 2023
10.
Typical day on X:
• NOAH YGLESIAS: How to solve the intractable problem I just learned about last week
• TMZ: Freeto Lace calls out B.O.B.A. on Glorbix
• YALE STUDENT: Hamas doesn’t hate the Jews
• HAMAS: We hate the Jews
• TECH MILLIONAIRE: My penis is only 10 years old— Sweet Meteor O'Death (@smod4real) November 10, 2023
11.
Dude. pic.twitter.com/A8OY8Md9cw
— Stormy (@Stormy_Life_) November 10, 2023
12.
Look, I'm not in favor of an asteroid hitting the Earth, but I'm not not in favor of an asteroid hitting the Earth. https://t.co/bMW7tQvbGa
— Rex Huppke (@RexHuppke) November 10, 2023
13.
Okay… But his face going to look like this in another 10-15 pic.twitter.com/8q7VA90Tc8
— (@InNeverland_) November 10, 2023
14.
Millionaire biohacker Bryan Johnson, 46, claims he has reverse-aged his PENIS by 15 years pic.twitter.com/5EZWh6Jb9f
— Gleeok Stan Account (@csmith03) November 10, 2023
15.
Modern day Gandhi? Millionaire unifies divided nation under the banner of making fun of his penis. https://t.co/5dh3dUs17w
— Mollie Heckerling (@mollieschmollie) November 11, 2023
16.
Benjamin Bellend https://t.co/3dxXjFTv3z
— Alex Micu (@axelk) November 10, 2023
17.
He looks like he’s Tilda Swinton’s great aunt https://t.co/cUNI5Iq17g
— No Quarter Will Be Given (@chaedria) November 10, 2023
If Greg Jenner weren’t already a treasured Public Historian and author, we’d have to suggest he should pursue a career writing headlines.
Who called it “reverse-aged penis” when Turning Back The Cock is right there!? https://t.co/iZcC4GbIHM
— Greg Jenner (@greg_jenner) November 9, 2023
READ MORE
Our 21 favourite funny reactions to the billionaire going head to head with the ageing process
Source Daily Mail Image wayhomestudio on Freepik Screengrab