24 very funny welcomes to New Year 2024
13.
Jan 1st: new year new me!
Jan 3rd: pic.twitter.com/Ry9AHnZd3G
— Not Today Eric (@NotTodayEric) December 30, 2023
14.
Literally every band, regardless of genre, on the Hootenanny: *plays first chord*
Jools Holland: pic.twitter.com/JxFowGeFh4
— David Forrest (@VillanoXIV) December 31, 2023
15.
Midnight wasn't this late in my 20s.
— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) December 31, 2023
16.
Absolutely delighted to receive a BBE* in the new year’s honours list for Services to Lounging and Pissing About.
*Best Before End
— Lev Parikian (@LevParikian) December 30, 2023
17.
I have five new pledges for 2024:
-shrink the economy
-increase debt
-grow waiting lists
-help the rich
-fuck the poor
-get better at maths— Parody Rishi Sunak (@Parody_PM) January 1, 2024
18.
In 2024 I intend to start grappling with people whilst covered in body oil. That's my New Year's Wrestle Lotion.
— Paul Eggleston (@pauleggleston) January 1, 2024
19.
2024 pic.twitter.com/nFfGXPmH88
— gage (@neatsaux) January 1, 2024
20.
D’you know what? I could have just used 2023 to learn how to spell diareah, but no, 2024 and still no clue x
— Buckers (@deathofbuckley) January 1, 2024
21.
If my first pint of 2024 is anything to go by, we’re all fucked. pic.twitter.com/eSqiNE7DSS
— Tokyo Sexwhale (@tokyosexwhale) January 1, 2024
22.
This year i’m not gonna procrastinate and am breaking all my New Year's resolutions in January instead of February.
— nika (@nikalamity) January 1, 2024
23.
Gyms in January pic.twitter.com/tjPYPbE7kK
— Ashley Davies (@MsAshleyDavies) December 29, 2023
24.
New Year’s resolutions when you’re young are like “learn a new language” or “be more outgoing” but when you’re older they’re more realistic like “drink water” or “sleep at night”
— Adam (@adamgreattweet) January 1, 2024
If 2024 can have an extra day, our 24 posts for 2024 can have this extra bit of wisdom for inspiration.
My New Year’s resolution is to pet more dogs and ignore more people.
— Lindsay (@Rollinintheseat) December 29, 2023
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