Holly Valance’s Tory hot takes made us despair for the satirists – 15 favourite reactions
If you were one of the many Holly Valance fans back in the early 2000s, either for her role in Neighbours or because of her pop career, her more recent public appearances may have shattered a few illusions.
The rot set in when Nigel Farage posted this photo of himself and Trump with Holly Valance and her Partygate-tainted husband, billionaire Tory donor Nick Candy.
But, if anything, her appearance at the launch of the latest Tory faction, Popular Conservatism, was even worse – because this time, they interviewed her.
Listen to her hottest of hot takes.
Holly Valance at #PopCons party
Liz Truss is great
Lee Anderson is amazing
Jacob Rees Mogg for PMApparently lefties are all crap and people just have to start working for a living, then they'd see the world as she does
♀️pic.twitter.com/qMGvsEbZlU— Carol Vorderman (@carolvorders) February 6, 2024
“Everyone starts off as a lefty and then wakes up at some point after you start either making money, working, trying to run a business trying to buy a home and then realise what crap ideas they all are.”
“Jacob for PM. The MP for Ashfield was awesome. Love a Northerner. Straight to the point and very sensible. For real people.”
For clarity, the MP for Ashfield is Lee Anderson. 30p Lee is the person she described as “awesome”.
The internet had something to say.
1.
Everyone is born a leftie until they get rich and don’t want to share – you aren’t enlightened or clever Holly Valance, you’re just selfish. Kiss kiss my ass.pic.twitter.com/e7fFjAWqxW
— Dr Bella MC (@Dr_BellaR) February 6, 2024
2.
Never go full Tory like Holly Valance pic.twitter.com/VJQKvNeWYH
— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) February 6, 2024
3.
Holly Valance hasn’t worked since 2013 and is married to a property developer with a net worth of £1.5 billion.
Of course she’s a Tory
— Secret Drug Addict (@ScrtDrugAddict) February 6, 2024
4.
"So tell me Holly, what was it about marrying a billionaire Tory donor that made you turn right wing?" https://t.co/uip0AJIimN pic.twitter.com/Xqa0gG7rT5
— Barry Maz – Got A Ukulele #GTTO #rejoineu (@bazmaz_ukulele) February 6, 2024
5.
Start working, buy a house, marry a billionaire.
— HENRY MORRIS (@mrhenrymorris) February 6, 2024
6.
I'm sure Holly Valance's stance would be a lot different if she hadn't bagged a billionaire and had to perform Kiss Kiss on a loop at Mighty Hoopla every June like the rest of the hard-working 00's Pop Girlies https://t.co/9Rf0AAZTgJ pic.twitter.com/0Wctqn0nh4
— teen there done that (@BRATTYBARBl) February 6, 2024
7.
she’s Kylie Minogue’s Wario.
Both Australians who got their big break on Neighbours, however Kylie is a pop genius with an enduring career and a love for her LGBT fanbase, whereas Holly Vallance is an right-wing idiot who hasn’t been relevant since 2003. https://t.co/1WjBiWtUU2
— C. (@cstsher) February 6, 2024
8.
38 year old left wing men everywhere stare blankly into their pints and wonder where it all went wrong https://t.co/ctNORAEpxj
— Hannah Fearn (@hannahfearn) February 6, 2024
9.
i felt a great disturbance in the Horn, as if millions of crushes suddenly cried out in horror and were suddenly extinguished;
turns out it was Holly Vallance saying "Jacob For PM" pic.twitter.com/KVzZTpXaWq
— Jane (@localnotail) February 7, 2024
10.
Christ. “Jacob for PM”
“ the MP for Ashfield was fantastic” https://t.co/tlUt7isK4H— richard bacon (@richardpbacon) February 6, 2024
11.
I preferred Toadfish anyway. Rack off. https://t.co/cb2l0cHQc6
— Sam Avery (@sam__avery) February 6, 2024
12.
Good God, she describes the Tories as “real people”.
How did her audition for the Twilight Zone reboot go?
A shoo-in!
— The Purple Pimpernel (@Eyeswideopen69) February 6, 2024
13.
I can now safely say that Kiss Kiss wasn't a good song, it was the sort of song that Kylie would say "nah you're alright cheers" to so they gave it to a shit version of Kylie and it never should have got to number one.
For more takes on Holly Valance just tune in to GB Sooz.
— Sooz Kempner (@SoozUK) February 6, 2024
14.
What fascinates me here given my previous keen interest in Ms Valance is how speedily she married a free market multimillionaire and shed her entire belief system after the death knell had rang on her brief musical and celluloid career… if Roy Castle was here…
— Stuzi (@stuzi_pants) February 6, 2024
15.
Who had ‘faded Aussie soapstar and karaoke singer Holly Valance’ as this week’s Tory Bellend of the Week? I should’ve placed a £1000 bet on it. https://t.co/YKkttSu0si
— Andrew McWilliam (@andrewmcw73) February 7, 2024
If a picture paints a thousand words, we’re guessing about 990 of them are probably NSFW.
You can tell a lot about a person by the company they keep. Eh, Holly? #PopCons #HollyValance https://t.co/geZ1C7vZC0 pic.twitter.com/O9nsFeU4iF
— Miffy (@miffythegamer) February 6, 2024
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Source H/T @carolvorders Image Screengrab