People have been sharing the household nicknames they have for everyday things – 17 absolute winners

Here’s a lovely little insight into what goes on behind people’s closed doors – no, not like that – after idontknow-imaduck asked this over on Reddit.

‘Does your household have alternative names for every day things?’

And idontknow-imaduck had an example to get things rolling.

Thanks to these cups we refer to coffee as ‘badgers’. Resulting in us frequently asking each other ‘do you want a badger?’

And it prompted no end of interesting and funny and occasionally totally bamboozling replies. Here are our favourites.

1.

‘One Christmas as a jokey stocking filler present my mum gave me a mini spatula with ‘Santa’s little helper’ written on it. Over time we’ve gone from calling it ‘Santa’s little helper’ to ‘Santa’s little bitch’ and now it just gets called ‘bitch’.

‘Beyond this one spatula, all spatulas are now referred to as bitch in our household, along with an identifying feature. Red bitch, big bitch, medium bitch etc. So stupid but here we are.’
zeddoh

2.

‘Bottle openers are called “The Fish”

‘This is because we once had a bottle opener in the shape of a fish. But it broke years ago. We replaced it with a regular non fish one, in fact several down the years. But still all requests for a bottle opener are “can you fetch me the fish?”
Hedgerow_Snuffler

3.

‘Shipe Knarfe, forever known as such since that one time my brother messed up saying ‘sharp knife’
CappucinoCupcake

4.

‘Tap water is “council pop.”‘
GorGasm_1

5.

‘Loudy Clemonade, cloudy lemonade, Mum was tired.’
angelindisguise

6.

“Cooncil juice” is what we call tap water in Scotland.’
Vectorman1989

7.

‘My mum once referred to my snake as my fish and it stuck ever since. Her reasoning was “they both live in tanks”.’
Equivalent_Light_592

8.

‘Mum and dad still have half size mugs commemorating Charles and Diana’s wedding. We will often ask if someone wants a full cup of tea or “just a Prince Charles”.’
BwanaBanana

9.

‘TV remote round ours is “The knobs”

‘The bit of paper in a box of chocolates that tells you what each one is is “The Rules”

‘Any mirror is a “mirrrrrr-rrrrrr” (nod to American friends)

‘The satnav screen in the car is “mouse cinema”.’
WoofBarkWoofBarkBark