Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
For reasons we don’t need to go into, it’s been hard for many people to raise a smile recently, and no amount of funny tweets will make those problems go away.
Thay can, however, push them to one side for a few minutes – and give you something to think and talk about other than, well, the bad stuff and Gary Barlow‘s giant son.
1.
Has anyone lived long enough to buy a second bottle of Worcestershire?
— Shannon (@gardengirl125) November 2, 2024
2.
In England "booster shot" is spelled "borchestershire shot".
— Bob Golen (@BobGolen) November 2, 2024
3.
I swear these two are sat in the corner of pretty much every Wetherspoons across the country #Strictly pic.twitter.com/SUW9wAdCY1
— Chris ️ (@chrispaget1) November 2, 2024
4.
I don’t wish to be dramatic but this single file queueing thing at bars represents, for me, the breakdown of civilisation.
— Liam Thorp (@LiamThorpECHO) November 3, 2024
5.
i can't wait until the new food pyramid comes out and everyone has to eat bear meat
— fightgeek (@fightgeek) November 4, 2024
6.
“Someone's had all the biscuits”
Translation: I've had all the biscuits.
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) November 5, 2024
7.
you’re not fooling anyone pic.twitter.com/6ErsL2TapP
— Images AI Could Never Recreate (@imagesaicouldnt) November 3, 2024
8.
Just found this tweet in my draughts folder
⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️
⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️
⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️
⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️
⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️
⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️
⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️
⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⬛️⬜️⚫️⚫️⚫️⚫️⚫️⚫️
⚫️⚫️⚫️⚫️⚫️⚫️
⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️
⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️⚪️— Olaf Falafel (@OFalafel) November 4, 2024
9.
I had to manually change the channel on the TV because the batteries in the remote died, and now the kids think I know magic.
— krista pacion (@kristabellerina) November 3, 2024
10.
I like to scan my backyard every hour with a high power flashlight to let my neighbors know I won't tolerate any weirdness around here
— Böb Jänke: Hönkÿ (@Bob_Janke) November 5, 2024
11.
My mate quit his job at BMW.
He of course gave no indication he was leaving.
— єℓαιηє (@elainesim28) November 7, 2024
12.
I’m at my most liar when I’m laying in my bed telling myself I don’t have to pee.
— Tony P. (@Tbone7219) November 7, 2024