Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
13.
Whoever said the Bible was the greatest store ever told never heard about my trip to Amsterdam involving 3 people, a one-eyed donkey and a bag of ketamine
— LorazeKim™ ☠️ (@LorazeKim) November 7, 2024
14.
Sometimes I think about when a woman told me I did it the easy way having twins and I didn’t kick her in the crotch.
— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) November 5, 2024
15.
It’s either five or nothing bro
– if wet wipes could talk
— Dx: Moonstruck (@moonstruckinnyc) November 4, 2024
16.
grampa: why are u always on ur phone
me: why didn't u stop hitler
— tate (@50FirstTates) November 3, 2024
17.
[exiting the voting booth with a little cup of urine] does anybody know who I give this too?
— Remembering Joey Garcia (@NotJosephGarcia) November 5, 2024
18.
[dinner party]
GUEST: it has come to my attention that one of us is a secret time traveller.
ME: *tasting wine the waiter brought to the table* mmm, what year is this?
[everyone slowly turns their head]
— Little Greenis (@DurtMcHurtt) November 6, 2024
19.
Need this backstory so bad pic.twitter.com/texsOasob0
— Chris Stedman (@ChrisDStedman) November 4, 2024
20.
Frantically deleting all my negative tweets about The Hamburglar after I get a job at McDonald’s
— Viktor Winetrout (@Cpin42) November 7, 2024
21.
One thing I miss about the pandemic is getting to rip my mask off like I just botched an appendectomy.
— Jason, ex inferis (@benedictsred) November 2, 2024
22.
Nothing recharges me for another workweek like 48 hours of laundry, cleaning, food shopping, and everything else I didn’t have time for last week
— Adam Karpiak (@Adam_Karpiak) November 4, 2024
23.
speaking in tongues is a great way to quickly end a bad first date
— Pixels Puddlefen (@gnomepuddlefen) November 7, 2024
24.
When the person giving wedding toast says “but in all seriousness” pic.twitter.com/PMMtchISll
— Zach Dunn (@zachbdunn) November 3, 2024
25.
i see a lot of ppl deleting their accounts. pls consider giving your password to a bot so this site becomes more unusable
— derek guy (@dieworkwear) November 8, 2024
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25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
Image Pixabay