‘What’s the funniest thing a friend from abroad has done and said in the UK?’ – 24 moments that got hilariously lost in translation

Getting to grips with the subtleties and nuances of life in a foreign country is a tricky endeavour, and the resulting culture clashes are often very funny.

Over in the corner of Reddit called AskUK, goggles189 asked ‘What’s the funniest thing a friend from abroad has done and said in the UK?’ and followed it up with a tale of their own:

‘A friend from Spain was visiting this summer, and I wanted to give him the most culturally British experience. I took him to Greggs where he got a pasty and a Fanta.

‘Before he paid he asked the woman behind the counter ‘Do you have a glass with some ice?’. I couldn’t help laughing and it was something my British friends found funny too. What’s the funniest thing a foreign friend has done when visiting?’

And plenty of people chipped in with some affectionate stories of their own.

1.

‘I had a Polish colleague that wanted to ask me a question. I laughed so hard when he started by saying ‘Sorry for buggering you..’.’
–thismyseriousaccount

2.

‘A Portuguese colleague of mine had been rinsing one of these big long absorbent socks we use to soak up spillages. He came up to me with a bucket of coolant that he’d rinsed out of the sock and said ‘I squeezed this from my sausage behind the machine, what do I do with it?’.’
–RacerRovr

3.

‘I had a French friend that once told me ‘Thank you from the heart of my bottom’. I told her that she got it mixed up and explained how it was wrong and she found it hilarious! We still joke about it to this day.’
–Accurate_Prompt_8800

4.

‘My friend was invited, by a Northerner, ’round for tea’. She ate beforehand.’
–Time-Cover-8159

5.

‘I was at a wedding, I sat next to my cousin’s wife (from the US) at the dinner table. The food arrived. The main course was lamb. I just glanced over, and I could see her spreading mint sauce onto some bread and eating it. She thought it was a fancy jam for the bread, she didn’t enjoy it. I found it very funny.’
–Rumhampolicy

6.

‘I’ve been with a polish woman for 13 years. She asked my dad ‘would you like to taste my juices’ after juicing a load of fruit.

‘I stubbed my foot finger.’

‘I’m not a great swimmer, but I can do doggy style.’

Probably stand out as the most memorable, but I have 13 years worth.’
–Colourbomber

7.

‘I had a Polish girlfriend many years ago and our first time going food shopping she said she wanted a ‘Push basket’ I laughed for ages. She was perfectly correct.’
–sharpinski`

8.

‘I had a Mexican colleague who was telling me about how weird the salad dressings are here and one day for lunch I saw her take out a tin of custard and pour it over her salad.’
–gamba-para-vida

9.

‘An old boss of mine was German, although a longtime UK resident when I knew her and married to a British guy. One day she said ‘You know the phrase ‘a blessing in disguise’?’. I said, yes, I did. ‘Why is it in the skies?’.

It took me a moment but… so endearing.’
–amandacheekychops

10.

‘My Greek friend says ‘For fuck’s shake’.’
–banwe11

11.

‘I used to have a German teacher who loved English idioms. He was exceptionally good at English and had lived here many years so I can’t be certain it wasn’t on purpose but he always used to say ‘That’s a whole different fish of kettle’.’
–catjellycat

12.

‘Our use of verbs for transportation is overly confusing. My Portuguese friend once suggested, on a sunny day, going for ‘a walk on a bike’.’
–illegitimate_guru