This all-time great C.V. is quite literally unbelievable
There’s an art to tweaking a C.V. so it remains true, whilst sounding better than it is. For example, you might choose to replace “Did the photocopying” with “Experienced in photo-reproductive technology” – you get the picture.
However, someone once shared a C.V. on Reddit, which stretches the boundaries of truth a little too much – either that or they should hire the guy straight away and make him the boss.
It’s not the easiest thing to read, so here’s a transcript so you don’t miss a single thing.
“To Whom it May Concern:
Resume is something for appeal myself, Let’s have a appeal time!
My big reason of come to Canada, Europe, North and South America travel.
So I apply to your shop. I am not a good English user. But when I was in Korea, everybody call me @Ace, you are a best!’ at Factory, hotel, farm, restaurant, mart.
Especially, I love always smile working environment, too short time I worked custom service but it is best work in my life and I want to feel again.
By the way, I worked kitchen help and server in the Canada. I always good when I am working. Please feel me.”
Now, obviously there are language issues, but how many of us could do this well in Korean? That’s not the main point, though – this is:
“I have brave fight to wild bear.
I have strong arm lift to wild bear.
I am so fast more than train.”
You what, mate? There was more –
“I can work without pay right now! I do not care, when will you pay me. Please pay me after you think I have Qualifications for get a pay.”
Absolute bargain for a man who can lift a wild bear and run faster than a train.
These comments nailed it.
Right? No wonder the job market is so tough when the competition is like this.
xeeroy
Fight AND flight? This guys got it all.
WangDanglin
I could use a bear-fighting loyal henchman, hook us up.
Colintywolfson
WhiskyIsMyAngryDrink had a relevant anecdote.
“All jokes aside, I helped a Korean guy new to Canada with his resume and interviewing skills. He now works as a robotic engineer for an international company pulling in more bank than I’ll ever see. This year he flew from the states to spend Christmas with me and straight up offered me his car because he doesn’t use his in Canada while working abroad.
Good friends for life.”
Wholesome stuff.
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