Someone asked for advice on how to chat up women and these 20 top tips were thoughtful and sometimes very funny

In an age where we spend less and less time out socialising, it can be tricky to meet people to date. And even if you do manage to find someone you’d like to ask out, knowing how to approach them is even harder.

However, one plucky chap took to the AskUK subreddit to ask for advice, posing the simple question ‘How do you chat up women on a night out?’ and following up with these thoughts…

‘I’m quite social, have many friends and can new make friends pretty easy. However, my conversations with women always fall flat very quickly. Anything more than basic small talk doesn’t end well, and often makes the women extremely bored. I don’t understand why I find it so difficult, as everyone is human. But for whatever reason, I’ve never been “good” at talking to women.

‘My friends have noticed, my boss has noticed, my dad has noticed, my mothers friends has noticed, etc. I’m not making it up. Yes confidence is important, but so are the words coming out your mouth. I just can’t seem to keep a conversation going, or even start most the time.

Luckily, there were plenty of people who wanted to jump in with advice on how to overcome the struggle of being tongue-tied.

1.

‘Little secret that the women of Reddit are probably going to downvote me for because they don’t want the secret coming out, but I just can’t keep silent on this.

‘When I met my girlfriend (together 5 years now) I simply just got my Tesco app out and showed her how many clubcard points I have. Women love clubcard points. Can’t get enough of them.’
–MIKBOO5

2.

‘How would you approach a new friendship with another guy? Like I don’t want to sound patronising but… women are just people. If you treat us like another species you’re probably gonna come off as treating the conversation as transactional, which isn’t great.’
–Low-Pangolin-3486

3.

‘Ask them questions. Listen. Ask them more questions.’
–rec-tify

4.

‘Don’t try to ‘chat them up’. It isn’t a sales pitch. You are not 15. Just talk to them like a normal person speaking to a normal person.’
–CiderDrinker2

5.

‘Every time I’ve pulled I’ve not really been trying. I just went out and acted like an idiot and sometimes girls like it. Go out and just have fun instead of trying to pull or puffing your chest out. Girls are out to have fun, nobody wants a load of pigeons puffing their chest and bobbing their heads cooing at them. Just have fun. Act silly with your mates.’
–greylord123

6.

‘From the sounds of it, you are overthinking it because you are talking to a woman not a man or a friend or something. That probably comes across as a combo of insecurity and ‘you make me nervous but I also want to shag you’ vibes which probably isn’t a turn on for most women..easier said than done to deal with it, but you need to relax.

‘Maybe don’t even think about them as romantic potential for a while, just practice talking to women and feeling socially comfy in their presence.’
–GanacheImportant8186

7.

‘Just ask if they know the average weight of a black billed gull and see where that conversation takes you, it’ll be hard to get back to ‘normal’ conversation from there (you don’t need to know the weight).’
–Smithstar89

8.

‘I’m a terrible conversationalist but a great listener. I’m married now, but have always found my strength lay in asking somewhat interesting questions and then being able to steer the direction of the conversation based off their answers. The alternative is asking a bunch of unrelated questions and it turns into an interview.

‘Women in my experience are great at chatting, if you are able to get things started they can keep it going as long as there is some mutual attraction.’
–Biggurlpretender

9.

‘It goes both ways – not to brag but I have a lot of experience with speaking to women, some of them are so dull and blunt it’s like talking to a brick wall some of them the conversation just flows.’
–bezostinks

10.

‘Charisma comes down to one thing in essence: making the other person feel interesting. If you ask them to talk about themselves, what interests them, what sort of things in their life get them excited to do, then you’ll have much better conversations.’
–topher2604