“What is the dumbest thing you ever heard a tourist say?” – 16 of the best/worst
As the double bank holiday weekend approaches, we can look forward to seeing more tourists wandering around filming stuff we stopped noticing years ago, or if we’re lucky, we could be those tourists. This makes the question posed by Dai Lama on Twitter particularly pertinent.
What is the dumbest thing you ever heard a tourist say?
— Dai Lama (@WelshDalaiLama) April 16, 2019
He even started the ball rolling with a few of his own.
I've got a few of these, but the best/worst has to be an American tourist in Aberystwyth gushing about her Welsh roots and how important it was to visit the land of her ancestors, then signing off with this immortal line:
"It's such a beautiful part of England" pic.twitter.com/afOPPrGxa0
— Dai Lama (@WelshDalaiLama) April 16, 2019
Another American, this time in the old town of Riga, stating confidently on the phone to someone that they were having a great time visiting "Lativa", which is a "city in Russia". Same guy later tried to pay with US dollars in a shop. pic.twitter.com/cLMgB5we37
— Dai Lama (@WelshDalaiLama) April 16, 2019
Finally, just to prove this isn't a thinly-veiled excuse to take the piss out of Americans, an Aussie at the zoo mansplaining to his girlfriend (who was having none of it) that a hippo is a female rhino. "The males have horns". pic.twitter.com/Q6Y1cj08Yy
— Dai Lama (@WelshDalaiLama) April 16, 2019
Obviously, Dai Lama’s examples were going to be hard to follow, but Twitter stepped up.
1.
Jeez, I wonder why they built the castle (Windsor) so close to the airport.
— Brian Moore (@brianmoore666) April 17, 2019
2.
Stopped by a tourist coming out of Westminster Tube Station only to be asked where Big Ben was. pic.twitter.com/ubAyMnAa9N
— John O'Brien ⭕ Seán Ó Brıaın (@3K_Fters) April 16, 2019
3.
Was in Harrods at Christmas time and heard a tourist say that a certain item she was looking at was 600 London monies it’s the only way I refer to expensive items now!
— emma kaye (@ejkayee) April 16, 2019
4.
American tourist at Stonehenge “they’re not very symmetrical are they?”
— FW (@frozenwarning) April 16, 2019
5.
“Do you have Christmas in Wales?”
— Gareth (@Cadmarch) April 16, 2019
6.
American asked guide in Hampton court who made the furniture as his wife would like to buy the exact same make. Guide coughed and told him unfortunately he died and is no longer making furniture!
— Nigel Williams (@kielder5) April 16, 2019
7.
In Reading, looking at the wildlife on the Thames I was asked ‘who keeps the swans so clean’ and were they locked up at night.
— Ed (@enddjinn) April 16, 2019
8.
On the Beatles bus tour in Liverpool – “Why isn’t Abbey Road on the tour agenda”.
— John Kelly (@sheepstealer) April 17, 2019