25 favourite funny tweets of the week
The weekend is so close, you could lean over and lick its face – or something less weird than that. We all know what’s going on in the world, and how awful it is – but here are some tweets that are almost nothing to do with any of that.
Share your favourites.
1.
The packing insert from our robot vacuum looks like it should be guarding a temple somewhere. pic.twitter.com/pNJ0Ntun9j
— Wm. Brett Hill (@magisternihil) February 27, 2022
2.
Microwaving your egg really does save time. pic.twitter.com/ODxXiQk7ZJ
— Sarah Kendall (@Sarah_Kendall) February 26, 2022
3.
Ur on wordle, I’m on my 30th attempt to guess my own password
— aurora… (@silicone_angel) February 27, 2022
4.
The exact moment I realised I had left the iron on. pic.twitter.com/AYJCsvmVWz
— Boring James Milner (@BoringMilner) February 28, 2022
5.
Living with two cats is just repeating “ok watch out…ok watch out…ok watch out” over and over again as you walk through the house until you die
— 'ti Reynard (@tiReynard) March 1, 2022
6.
Had a tweet in drafts and now someone else has already tweeted it. It’s like they stole a pie cooling on my windowsill.
— Bummer T. Vibes, Esq (@VibesBummer) February 28, 2022
7.
Told my mum about something very serious and told her not to tell dad. She told my dad and then told him not to tell me and my dad called me and told me he knows and told me no to tell mum, so basically all 3 of us know but can’t tell each other.
— Sharron(Shiv)💙💛xx🇺🇦 (@LoveShivxx) February 28, 2022
8.
no one:
my dog: it’s 2am. better start licking myself.
— Ordinary (@OrdinaryAlso) March 1, 2022
9.
Paw Patrol Season 3 sounds intense pic.twitter.com/B8CyjC0Vv6
— Julicorn (@ChicksRule) March 1, 2022
10.
Boss: we want you to run the presentation next week
Me: pic.twitter.com/7zanNALwCA
— MF FairyPrincessSmoo (@Smooheed) March 1, 2022
11.
The journey of a thousand miles starts w/ downloading a travel app, no not that one, the other one, which email do you want to use, it says it’s already registered, request password reset, no that’s not enough characters, wait you forgot a special character you know what fuck thi
— President Warren G. Harding in the Streets (@PopeAwesomeXIII) March 1, 2022
12.
kids in 2050 trying to study the 2019-2022 chapter of history for a test pic.twitter.com/Je5j8AzSMU
— Shafeeq (@Y2SHAF) February 28, 2022