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23 favourite Billy Connolly moments and jokes to mark the Big Yin’s 80th birthday
Happy birthday to the great Billy Connolly, who turns 81 today.
To mark the Big Yin’s Big Day, enjoy these 23 of our favourite Billy Connolly moments and jokes.
1.
Still to this day, the best explanation of “fuck off”.#billyconnolly #bigyin pic.twitter.com/8YX7LUGOvy
— All about Steve (@1StevieKilner) March 6, 2020
2.
“I once travelled to Adelaide on Emu Airways. I was 5,000 ft up in the air when someone pointed out to me that emus can’t fly”
3.
“I worry about ridiculous things, you know, how does a guy who drives a snowplough get to work in the morning… that can keep me awake for days”
4.
“People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is pal, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?”
5.
“A mate of mine has just told me he’s shagging his girlfriend and her twin. I said how can you tell them apart, he said ‘her brother’s got a moustache!’”
6.
“I know a Scottish guy who loved his wife so much that he told her he loved her one day”
7.
“I don’t like Born Again Christians. I’m not too keen on Born-the-first-time Christians”
8.
There are two seasons in Scotland: June and winter
9.
Billy Connolly telling the signal man joke. A classic pic.twitter.com/XwvKMTWXCH
— (@KCThrash) August 4, 2022
10.
“Never trust a man who, when left alone in a room with a tea cosy, doesn’t try it on”
11.
“A well-balanced person has a drink in each hand”
12.
“People who ask, ‘can I ask you a question?’ Didn’t really give me a choice there, did you sunshine?”