22 favourite New Year’s resolution tweets for 2023
It’s the time of year when we’re encouraged to try and change our lives and ourselves via New Year’s resolutions, such as –
Lose weight
Stop drinking alcohol
Give up chocolate
Write 5000 words of your novel every day
Grow taller
Develop telekinesis
Maybe not all of them. Who’d want to give up chocolate?
Naturally, people have been tweeting about resolutions – theirs, other people’s, the general concept. We picked some we thought you’d enjoy for a variety of reasons. Some are funny, some are relatable, some are more realistic than others.
Is yours in the list?
1.
As always, my New Years Resolution is to annoy less grammar pedants.
— Richard Osman (@richardosman) January 1, 2023
2.
if you haven’t come up with a new years resolution by now, then unfortunately yours has automatically defaulted to “talk with a dracula voice.” sorry but rules are rules
— soul nate (@MNateShyamalan) December 31, 2022
3.
Realistic new year's resolutions:
Get slightly older each day
Eat more cheese
Discard old socks
Drink the same amount of tea
Never run out of biscuits
Say “getting there” a lot
Muddle through— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) December 31, 2022
4.
A grey start to the year here. No hangover.
My New Year’s resolutions?
Only high quality, thoroughly deserved hangovers.
Less grey. pic.twitter.com/cIByRezNaB— Russell Crowe (@russellcrowe) December 31, 2022
5.
My new year's resolution is to learn how to fill a Kia Rio with petrol and pay for it.
— Parody Rishi Sunak (@Parody_PM) January 1, 2023
6.
Don't just tell yourself what your New Year's resolutions are going to be. *Write them down* and put that list in a place where you'll see it every day. This will bring you huge time savings next New Year's Eve, when you'll need to remember what they were and make them all again.
— Elliott Downing (@elliott_downing) January 1, 2023
7.
New Year's Resolutions
1) Quit social media pic.twitter.com/yKtoQjsFZ2— Damien Kempf (@DamienKempf) December 31, 2022
8.
2023 New Year’s resolutions—-
Nag my children more
More staring blankly at my phone
Eat more frosting
Complain more
Watch More low quality television— Molly Jong-Fast (@MollyJongFast) December 30, 2022
9.
New year’s resolution, same as every year pic.twitter.com/s2SbEsIMY8
— Nick Levine (@mrnicklevine) December 29, 2022
10.
Making new new year's resolutions after failing to complete the old ones pic.twitter.com/C1eIcM9caF
— shivalika (@notahotpotato) December 30, 2022
11.
I am jealous of our 5 year old's New Year's resolutions. pic.twitter.com/AobBddTVtp
— Laura (@laurawritesit) January 1, 2023