Our 25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
We’re in the home stretch of 2023 and it’s all go. The Covid Inquiry has heard Boris Johnson redefine the boundaries of avoidance, the weather has been borderline arctic and there have been sightings of Easter chocolate in the shops.
Meanwhile, on Twitter/X, people have been making us laugh, and we’ve gathered 25 favourites to round off the week nicely.
1.
ME: I made you breakfast, babe. It's Greggs benedict.
WIFE: You mean eggs Benedict
ME: *pouring Hollandaise sauce over a sausage roll* I do not.
— FᎪᎢ ᏩᎪNᎠᎪᏞF (@sofarrsogud) December 4, 2023
2.
Me heading to the the shops to get milk pic.twitter.com/6k1WHXB4PJ
— Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) December 3, 2023
3.
If you see this car ring the police,
It's stollen. pic.twitter.com/LXchlteMMJ— The Dad Joke Man (@DadJokeMan) December 3, 2023
4.
sorry yeah I will go to sleep I just need to check every single website
— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) December 4, 2023
5.
Annoying when a package goes to the wrong house, but on the other hand, I'm building a great photo collection of my neighbors' doors
— meghan (@deloisivete) December 7, 2023
6.
Irish people when they see you wear a coat with more than one colour pic.twitter.com/RlHVGtatmT
— SHANE REACTION (@imshanereaction) December 4, 2023
7.
Elon Musk taking over Twitter pic.twitter.com/a5eFY6K87n
— Scott Bryan (@scottygb) December 5, 2023
8.
— Classical Studies Memes for Hellenistic Teens (@CSMFHT) December 7, 2023
9.
My soup was a bit bland so I had a word with the waiter – see it, say it, salted.
— Arthur Smith (@ArfurSmith) December 7, 2023
10.
Me: Do you need to go outside?
Dog:
Me: Outside?
Dog:
Me: Do you need to pee?
Dog:
Me: Go poop? Go outside?
Dog:
Me: Ugh. Fine.
Dog:
Me: [gets coffee and gets comfy on couch]
Dog: You won’t believe this.— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) December 2, 2023
11.
Our exterminator left his notebook at our house today and – literally – this was all he wrote down. pic.twitter.com/hRBFIO573b
— Molly Oswaks (@mollyoswaks) December 8, 2023
12.
so I’m driving back from the shops and I see someone walking a corgi, and it’s pretty quiet so obviously I pull over to say hi, because, you know, corgi, and lads I had fully parked the car and gotten out before I realised
that the person was my husband and the corgi is my corgi
— ❄️mari-lwyd odent❄️ (@oldenoughtosay) December 6, 2023