A Brit threw 100% shade at Americans’ capacity for drink and these 13 replies are all worth raising a glass to
America and Britain are bound together by a shared history, a common language, an overlap in religious beliefs and legal principles, it says here.
And a shared capacity for booze? Well, maybe. But – let’s face it – probably not.
We mention this after one Brit’s challenge for our transatlantic cousins went viral on Reddit after it was shared by angelsrepose who asked ‘Would they?’
And these responses were all worth raising a glass to.
1.
‘As if this is even a challenge.’
No-Poem-3773
2.
‘The Scots could do it alone we already drink 40% more ethanol than Americans do.’
Hayley-The-Gaymer
3.
‘No no. You have to battle plan. We send the southerners and Welsh in first. The Welsh are there to add some strength in the first wave to show we’re not sandbagging them.
‘Then when the Southern fairies let us down, we send in Northern Ireland as the next wave. They’ll hold their own longer than the entirety of the South-East and London, but they will still fall against the sheer numbers.
‘Then we send the North and Midlands in. The Geordies and Mackems should take care of 50% of whatever the US has left on their own, but adding in those miserable bastards from across the midlands will dent them as they talk through their drinks too.
‘Then, when we in the North begin to wobble slightly, that my friend, is when you send in the Jocks. They will lose maybe 10 men at most, and utterly humiliate the remnants of those yanks.
‘Edit: we also forget the ladies effect in this. America winos pass out after their daily glass with valium. The “Slags of Essex” battalion will take on every single American Woman before we even need to break out the Geordie Lasses.’
SpoofEx2024
4.
‘American here. My money ain’t on the home team.’
AlphaNoodlz
5.
‘Yeah but I bet we could easily beat them in an opioid off. Or maybe a meth off?’
Bobert_Manderson
6.
‘I’ll do it on my own.’
Chance-Resource-4970
7.
‘American here, reckoned competent with a glass. I’ve drunk with British people, lived to tell of it, and I’m here to tell you without shame that I would fear for the safety and sovereignty of my beloved nation were this contest to come to pass.’
unclefes
8.
‘Mate I don’t think Texas, California, Florida and New York combined could handle Newcastle and Sunderland, let alone if we throw Scotland in there.’
SpoofEx2024
9.
‘The strategy is simple, we send the Londoners in first … This will allow us to see the US hand, give them a false sense of security, then the southern scrumpy swiggers get a fair innings and take out around 10 million yanks by themselves which should shake their resolve some what.
‘After that we send in the SDF special drinking forces (the Scottish) to cripple them with a mighty blow, primarily the Glaswegian battalion which should whittle them down to a mere 90 million or so… The Elite Guinness Guard would be paradropoed in securing the main drinking forces.
‘After that the Welsh go in and mop up the rest while the English just sit back knocking back pints enjoying the show. Hoorah!’
hyperskeletor
10.
‘I think i’ve just done it.’
gerrineer
11.
‘Makes me laugh when you watch an American film and they rock up to a frat party with 4 bottles of beer between about 8 of them and declare they are gonna get wasted.’
Longy77
12.
‘Where the US and UK share military posts, the US used to be instructed “don’t drink with the Brits”.’
Shot_Principle4939
13.
‘It’s barely a contest having two glasses in America with your dinner makes you an alcoholic in the UK it makes you the designated driver.’
GrandMasterofAngels4
Don’t drink and drive, obviously.
Source Reddit u/angelsrepose