25 Favourite Funny Tweets of the Week
What can we say about this week?
The UK finally has a date for the general election, Andrew Tate has been utterly given the brush-off by the Irish and Rudy Giuliani launched his own brand of coffee.
What a time to be alive.
Even with all that going on, people found the time to head to Twitter/X and give the rest of us a laugh. Here are 25 favourites.
1.
Congrats to City on their fourth title in four years. And congrats to Lance Armstrong on seven consecutive Tour de France titles.
— John Green (@sportswithjohn) May 19, 2024
2.
If you work from home and you can afford it, always get a cleaner. I’m getting so much done by hiding away in my office to avoid seeing the disapproval on her face at the state of my house.
— Hal Cruttenden (@Halcruttenden) May 20, 2024
3.
I don’t know why Apple is charging me 7.99 , 3.99 and 10.99 and I will never know. frankly that is none of my business
— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) May 23, 2024
4.
My greatest fear? That the menswear guy finds a picture of me in a suit and for some reason decides to do a thread about it
— Andrew Hunter Murray (@andrewhunterm) May 22, 2024
5.
Hate when you send a work email and feel relived to put the ball in someone else’s court but then they write back like 10 minutes later and you’re like GODDAMMIT
— SpacedMom (@copymama) May 16, 2024
6.
I've noticed that parents who go into "Baby Changing Facilities" invariably come out with the same one.
Very suspicious.
— Jason (@NickMotown) May 20, 2024
7.
Rather than appointing a new manager Chelsea should just have a guest manager each week, like Have I Got News For You.
— Paul Watson (@paul_c_watson) May 21, 2024
8.
Got to get a train in to London for before 10am so if anyone needs me I'll be REMORTGAGING THE HOUSE
— Gabby Hutchinson Crouch (@Scriblit) May 20, 2024
9.
i hate my fuckass brain. every time i see this sign on a plane my immediate impulse is to interpret it as “sowwy no stowage ” pic.twitter.com/D8hNijzk5D
— zach silberberg (@zachsilberberg) May 21, 2024
10.
My daughter is now a licensed driver and we had her go out to pick us up some dinner.
Y’all, it took 16 years, but I got my own Uber Eats driver now— McDad (@mcdadstuff) May 19, 2024
11.
do you think fish are proud that they're in such iconic company with cheese, fear, and war as the only things you can monger
— katie (@focusfronting) May 20, 2024
12.
This sign is an absolute LIE and the family that live in this house are incredibly rude. Do not fall for this trick cannot see what they get out of it absolute time wasters?! pic.twitter.com/679BfMITPc
— Laura Lexx (@lauralexx) May 21, 2024