Life Ask Reddit biology human body
These women sharing what they learned about men for the first time is a delightful tour of human biology
Bodies, who’d have ‘em?
From pointless teeth that literally erupt from your adult gums to the fact that 57% of cells in the human body are not actually human, we’re a pretty weird bundle of biological phenomena.
And that’s not even half of it. Time to thank your lucky stars. Redditor dropd saw fit to ask the women of the community:
What was something you didn’t know about men till you got with one?
Brace yourselves for some quirky social, psychological and physical tidbits, and quite a lot of information about private parts.
1.
The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.
That whole thing about the way to their heart being their stomach? Accurate.
I once hooked up with a guy I met on Tinder, made him breakfast the next morning.
He said no woman had ever cooked for him before, looked teary, and now we’re married.
–burntgreens
I made my ex a Snickers cheesecake for Valentine’s Day and he stayed with me for three more months despite not even liking me that much.
–cunninglinguist32557
I once stayed with a girl way longer than I should have because my CDs were in her car.
–jwbrkr21
OK, not entirely related, but interesting nonetheless.
2.
Phone conversations are not longer than they need to be.
My ex wife was shocked at how short a phone conversation can be for dudes. My best friend called me once, this man literally flew across the country once to be at our wedding, called me because he was bringing me to work the next day.
“Still need a ride?”
Yep.
“OK, I’ll be there at 5:30.”
Sounds good.
And that was it. She sat there astonished and was asking why didn’t we want to talk to each other?
I really had no good answers either, it’s just the way it goes I guess.
–tommyboy3111
My favourite cousin texted me.
“We got engaged, best man?”
“Yep!”
“Cool.”
His wife is still baffled by it.
–Britta_is_in_this
3.
Being quiet doesn’t mean they’re mad.
They’re just vibing.
–SnooAvocados9343
“What are you thinking?”
“I’m trying to figure out how many iron smelters I need to make na optimal barrel factory.”
–TheDisapprovingBrit
This is too painfully true. My ex once saw me very visibly deep in thought staring at the ceiling in bed while cuddling.
She asked what I was thinking about and apparently Amish barn construction is not the correct answer in these situations.
–TransformingDinosaur
4.
Poop in the toilet? Aim for it.
If there is a poop stain in the toilet, they will try to aim their pee to hit it.
–pippybongstocking93
It’s really disappointing if we can’t fully remove it with a full bladder.
–Codetemplar
When you got that Austin Powers out of cryo lever bladder and still can’t power wash it. Feels bad, man.
–calfmonster
Isn’t love just the sweetest? (Credit: PublicDomainPictures from Pixabay)
5.
Morning wood.
Had absolutely no idea that [bleep] just pops up every night till I started dating my first boyfriend.
–kpie007
It’s basically BIOS. Checking on the basic stuff before the software in our brain turns on.
–flimspringfield
BIOS stands for Basic Input/Output System, FYI. It’s the first program that loads when you turn on a computer. It *ahem* initialises the hardware.
Redditors seem to like the idea of morning wood being some sort of threat detection device. A guard dog, if you will.
“What is it boy? Do you see something?”
–narfywoogles
It do be like that. I’m a developer. I’ll be smacking my head against a wall trying to solve a but and I’ll get one. Just… why?
–SpicymeLLoN
6.
The scrotum has a mind of its own.
That the ballsack physically moves around and you can see it when it gets looser or tightens.
It’s super fascinating to look at. You can also feel it. And the man can’t control it.
–Viking_gurrrrl
I trust my balls to know what state they need to be in. They seem to be handling things well enough so far.
–huyan007
Except for that one time they thought they needed to be in Vermont, when I was in New Mexico.
–Dason37
7.
And finally, not strictly (at all) biological, but still.
‘That when they need to go to the store they just go straight to that item and then pay and leave. It’s something I need to learn, lol.’.
–SnooConfections6062
‘This only works if the store is not a hardware store or a sporting goods store or some hobby store. I mean sure, if it’s a pharmacy and I want shaving cream, that’s what I’ll get.
‘If I’m in Home Depot and I need some glue, I’ll spend half an our in the cordless power tool aisle, then wander over to the garden section, then wander back through the grills. I’ll leave with the glue and a set of drill bits and a new screwdriver set.’
–ClownfishSoup
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Source: r/AskReddit